It's back

Ok. It's back. The menses is back when baby is 11months 18 days. 

It doesn't feel good. I feel sick and weak. Sigh. I need my strength, energy and mood to take care of my darling. AF, please treat me nicer, thank you. I really hope my milk supply isn't affected that much. Sorry darling, you may feel alittle fustrated with milk milk these few days. 

Nemesis: The Bottle

Today is another heart breaking day. She was crying real hard just now. Yep. We bullied her. Bottle is really her nemesis.

Last month we managed to coax her to drinking from the bottle. Of course it was heartbreaking to see and hear her cry so badly. But we managed it after a while of changing the bottle from avent to nuk latex teat. 

Then I had to come down with matitis. My supply dropped to the pits. And to increase my supply, direct latching is a must. 

And hence... Today's heartbreaking episode. Sobs. 

Sorry darling. It's mummy's fault. Sorry that you had to cry so hard and long, till your eyes and eyebrows were so red. Mummy feels so heartbroken to see you in that state. But we have no choice. You have to get used to bottle feeding for emergencies. It's just once a day. Jiayou darling. Mummy loves you lots. 

Lucky mummy

I am very lucky to have such supportive family members.

Yesterday we celebrated my brother's birthday. I offered my carrier to them, asking if anyone wants to babywear the LO. My dad volunteered asap. I think my brother wanted too. Happy that they are into babywearing too. Next time I will introduce wrapping to them. One step at a time. 

And while having our desserts, LO got hungry. I nip her on the spot with the Ergobaby carrier. Nobody said anything and we carried on with desserts. My mom even helped cover me with LO's blankie (which wasn't really necessary). 

I had read about mummies facing negative remarks and thoughts from their family members on the online support group. I'm really glad and happy my family is very open to these. 

Of course my hubby is one very important person too. He babywears LO. Shares my pain when I had cracked and sore nipples initially. Offers to bottle feed ebm to LO (for the 'once a day to get LO used to bottle' stage). And he even lets me buy our Autumn when we already have an Ergo. 

I love them. I'm one lucky mummy. 

Breastfeeding : Decline of BM

Ever since the painful blocked ducts from Friday, I got chills and fever on Saturday. The chills had me shivering with chattering teeth. Fever had even reached 38.8 degrees. Aching and soreness continued. They are all symptoms of matitis. Luckily after two panadols, my fever declined. And so did my supply.

Worse. LO did not seem satisfied with the feed from the affected side. And the other side's supply is slowly declining too.

Worried, I went to the GP on Sunday to get antibiotics in fear of further inflammation and decline of supply. The fever was still there. The GP seems reluctant to give me the antibiotics. But I know I need it. 

Today the supply was still bad in the morning but better in the evening. LO used to feed on only one side to be full for each feed before I fell sick. Now she needs to nurse on both to feel satisfied. I feel bad as she seems so frustrated to nurse. But I need her help to help me get over this.

Stock image from iStockphoto

I just hope this episode ends quickly. I want to provide more for my LO. Now is just more massages and more nursing. Thank you my dear little angel, for being patient (though not all of the times haha). Mummy loves you.

Breastfeeding : Blocked ducts

I have been breastfeeding my LO since day 1. The only times I did not give her BM was when she was in the hospital for 48hrs of phototherapy as Hubby wanted me to rest and not go to and fro the hospital. And that two incidents when the polyclinic PD asked me to give her FM two days before appointment, since her jaundice level did not go down as fast due to BM jaundice. But I stopped a day on the second incident after the results did not improve as much as expected in the first.

Breastfeeding has been quite smooth after we have gotten past the cracked nipples, soreness and shooting pain at the initial few weeks. Engorgement happened during the first week and it was very painful. With paid help from a LC at KKH, it was better and for the next 2 months plus, everything was quite smooth. Latching and pumping well. Supply was enough for LO too.

Today I woke up with blocked ducts. PAINFUL. And the more I massaged it away, the more sore it got. End up, the entire side was sore and aching. It felt bruised. It felt tortured. I know that with continued nursing, the ducts will clear, but it did not help that LO has a smaller appetite now. So I can only pump and massage. But continuous pumping means increasing supply. I shall try harder.

Ouch. x___X

Stock image from dreamstime.com

KKH Breastfeeding Class

We just attended the 7^th lesson of the Antenatal Classes that we signed up at KKH. The lesson today comprises of Breastfeeding. Today's class has been very enriching. There were alot of things I did not know and I had learnt several new things. Things like

• Things to "prepare" before feeding
• How to see if LO is feeding well
• Ways to carry the LO for feeing
• and more...

Image from FreeDigitalPhotos.net

At the end of the class, I felt excited. I can't wait for my Little One to pop so that I can feed her, while at the same time, worried that I may not do well and also worried that I may get grouchy during feeding. The process is quite taxing.

Time to read up on the Breastfeeding book GF loaned me.
Successful breastfeeding : a practical guide by Kang Phaik Gaik.

Psst. My Fisher Price rocker arrived today. I am so happy! http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00A4B34HG/ref=ox_ya_os_product_refresh_T1

Fisher-Price Infant To Toddler Rocker, Jungle Fun USD44.99